mirror mirror

standing in front of the mirror

my face is a blank canvas

paint me as i am

who am i?

thinking back to the roles i’ve played

trying to find the one who everyone will adore

hating what i’ve become

or what i will be

who am i truly?

She’ll Never Be The Same

Here she goes again. This time she’s Katherine, the never-pleased workaholic.

“I told Adam that powerpoint for Heisenberg & Company was due Wednes. What is possibly taking him so long?” She paces back and forth, pressing her imaginary bluetooth further into her ear.

“Calm down, Kath. I promise everything will work out. The company’s not going under.” I sit her down in the nearest chair and smoothed out the wrinkles in her shirt.

“I just hate how I get so worked up over this job but I want to do my best.” She rubbed her temples and tapped her feet. I went over to the refrigerator and grabbed her a can of soda. When I tried to hand it to her, she smacked it away.

“Lauren, are you insane? The sodium content in this is through the roof! Let me finish up this last set and I’ll whip you up one of my world famous protein shakes!” Kourtney, the health nut. Where was she when I was going through that breakup and shoveling tons of ice cream down my throat?

“Did you ever fill out the gym membership form? I thought we could go turn ours in tomorrow and get started right away! June told me they have the best Zumba instructor and I’ve got to see what the big hullabaloo’s about!” She dropped her 5lb weights and started to do some jumping jacks.

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll go check if it’s on my desk.” I know that by the time I come back, she’ll be another person. After a while. I just learned to deal with it. She’s had countless relatives turn their back and everyone keeps telling me to get her help. I’ve hosted interventions and had her see the best doctors in the state but nothing seems to work. Sometimes, I think she’s just doing it for attention. We pretty much lived a storybook life. When we were younger, I was the star student and prom queen while Caroline just was kind of an outcast. Everyone is the family tried to get Caroline involved in things around the community but she never really took the offer.

“Oh my goodness!” Caroline shouted from the other room. I ran in to find her hunched over an old stain in the carpet from a dinner party years ago.

“Lauren, hand me that spray bottle on the counter. This has got to go.” Mrs. Agnes Smith VI, the old British woman who likes to keep everything in “tip top shape”. I handed her the bottle and she was spraying frantically. I sat on the loveseat and just watched her. Tears began to fill in my eyes. I want my sister back. Without the different personalities. Just Caroline Diane Tanner. Will ever I get her back?

it's never what it seems

the song in my heart

the lyrics on my mind

pen meets paper

ideas & thoughts

from my brain to your ear

words that spark a

conversation

imagination

my pockets cannot contain

such creativity

cover them with a cap

the rain leaves a lingering smell

it fills my  nostrils

strap it tight

like shoelaces

cause you and i

we were born to die

I am

I am

a bird

that has no song to sing

A telephone

that has no ring

I am

a player

that has no game

A being

that puts all to shame

I am

a pen

that has no ink

I am

me

known as the weakest link

social media

list of websites i belong to:

twitter
tumblr
simblr

Play With Lif3.

so here's a poem i wrote about my most beloved-ed, le sims trois (:

A plumbob hangs above their head

spinning around and ‘round

They stand in one place complaining

as their motives fall down

Green, yellow, and red are the stages in how one feels

OH NO!

A fire has started

because somebody left dinner on the grill

A made up language they speak

The social creatures they are

Look up! It’s a star!

Or

apieceofspacedebristhatwillcrashandkillyou

The magical gnomes roam the lot and make more

While your sims snipes & groans that they’d rather watch TV

versus doing chores

The wishes they wish

to buy a car, to spend a night on the town, or to kiss

Simoleons make the world go round

The pixelated babies wrapped in blankets so bound

Cleaning counters so they glimmer

And you know what they say

Once a simmer,

Always a simmer.

Shame On You and Me: Chapter 5

Shame on You and Me
Chapter 5
Breann Wathen

    Ian pulled into the apartment building complex and my heart sank. If I could only spend another hour with him, or maybe even my whole life. I could feel him ease up on the gas so it would take longer to get there. A bunch of people in other cars expressed their rage. Seems like they’ve never been in love before.

    I saw Chuck and Jett smoking cigarettes outside of the building. Oh shit. I know that if I get out of another guys’ car, they’re gonna rat me out. I’m not taking those chances.

    “Ian, stop right here.” I hit the dashboard and unbuckled my seatbelt.

    “But you live over there, right?”

    “My neighbors are gonna rat me out if they see me with you. Unless I flash them, but I’m not that desperate.” I nervously laughed. I knew Chuck were the eyes while Jett was the ears. A tag team. A duo. Ready to report any damn thing to the tenant for a $100 bucks off their rent.

    “Okay. Here’s my number.” Ian unlocked the doors and handed me a slip of notebook paper.
    “Alright, see you later.” We kissed for what felt like an hour. I didn’t want to leave him. He waved slowly as he backed out of the parking lot and left. I took several shortcuts through the apartment buildings, carefully avoiding those two bastards.
    Luckily, Ms. Gregory came to my rescue. She walked up to the two and smacked a shared cigarette out of their grubby hands.
    “Those are death sticks lads! That why Mr. Gregory walked around with that burden of an oxygen tank. You don’t want to end up like him, do you? Dead?” She was in a blind rage. I took my chance and snuck past them into the building. Fumbling for my keys, I heard someone on the outside.
    It was more like faint giggling…from a woman. I ran through all the possibilities of why the hell another woman would be in our apartment. Maybe it was Becky next door. She was always needed something like fabric freshener sheets or a spoonful of peanut butter. It could be his mom, who I haven’t met. Is that a bad sign of saying this relationship wouldn’t last?
    Before I could find the right key, someone had gotten to the doorknob before me.
    “Amber! Ohmigod! I thought you were dead!” Chelsea wrapped her toned arms around me. It was Chelsea. Just Chelsea. Phew.
    “Uh, no. I’m all in one piece. The piece that you’re squeezing.” She relaxed her grips, but her hands were still on my shoulders.
    “Babe, I thought you were seriously hurt. You didn’t even try to call or text back. I was worried.” I saw a tear drop my Nate’s eye. Oh shit. Here I was out having the time of my life, cheating on my boyfriend who really cares.
    “I’m sorry. It was that things had gotten hectic. With all the news reporters being there and the ambulances.” I grabbed Nate into a deep embrace. I looked up into his brown eyes and he smiled. What am I doing? He leaned forward and I involuntary kissed him. I heard Chelsea make a gagging sound. I smirked. As he pulled away, I got the weirdest feeling in my stomach. Like the world was spinning to fast and I could feel it move. I almost collapsed.
    “Whoa! Ambs, are you okay?” Nate had caught me, his eyes wavering.
    “I guess.” I was weaving through everything that happened today. Every thought I had ever thought. And it hit me. I’m a horrible person. How could I go and hook up with some guy that’s been after me for years and then go back to me happy home with my boyfriend and lie to his face?
    “Maybe you need something to eat? Anyone wanna head to Red Robin’s? My treat, somebody gave me a gift card for 25 bucks.” Chelsea slightly jogged to the couch and searched her purse.
    Nate had hoisted me into a dining room chair, kneeling in front of me.
    “How does that sound Ambs?” He was gently massaging my hands.
    “Sounds great you guys. Uh, can I just change into something else real quick?” I tried to stand but my legs didn’t seem to carry my weight. I fell down back into the chair.
    “You know what? I can fix some hamburgers. Chels, thanks for the offer but I think she needs to stay here for a little while. Just to shake it off, you know?” Nate was basically trying to shoo Chelsea away.
    “Alright, but call me if anything pops up or happens. Good night.” Chelsea waved, keys jingling between her fingers.
    “Want some water or something?”
    “Uh, sure. I am a little thirsty.” I lolled my head around and rubbed my temples. Was this guilt? Or just after shock from the crash? The last thing I heard was the faucet running and someone yelling ‘Amber!’.